ANC 33: from friendship to memory.

213. When a friend let you down

Having shifted to many places since I was a second grader, I did not get many chances to make friends who've been with me for years. I always envied people having the same friends for many years. They could share everything they experienced to their friends because time makes them know each other better. On the other hand, I knew my friends and they knew me, but they couldn't understand me completely when I talked about the phase of difficulties I faced in my life. 

Nevertheless, God was fair. He gave me a very good opportunity to build up such friendship I desired. On the very first day of my school in sixth grade, new to the class, I quietly sat on an empty chair. The guy in front of me seemed curious about me. We talked for awhile. The conversation was awkward but entertaining. When our class teacher arranged our seats again, we got to sit next to each other. As he helped me adjust to the class, we developed a very tight friendship. Since his name and mine started with alphabets next to each other, we were partners for any activities. We were best friends like that for four years. 

When I shifted school, slowly crevices appeared in our friendship. I could hardly contact him nor could he. Once in a while when we talked on the phone, we did not know what to say other than words of conveying regards. Our friendship was drawn into thin sheets everyday that it almost reached a state of an open circuit. There was no signs of empathy from either of us. 

And last month, I realized that the friendship no longer was intact. He had removed me from his list of friends on a social network website, our only source of contact. I knew that what he did was the best for us: moving forward before we would have ended things in a more complicated and dissatisfying manner. Through this way, we can leave our friendship as a lovely memory that happened some years ago. I did understand him. But at the same time, I was put down. Only if we contacted more often.. only if I had called him more often... only if I made the effort to visit him when I was on my vacations... 

I agree that he made the right choice.  But I can't stop from being reminded of him. I think I can do better if I get the second chance... Will it be too late? 

I miss you, my friend.