Another goodbye...

Today was another day of goodbyes. I've said goodbyes to so many people that now I find saying goodbye just another part of life. But I wonder why it gets harder every time. Maybe today's graduates were just one of my favorite classes. Maybe I learnt over the years that I miss people after goodbyes. But... Maybe... just maybe it was so hard to say goodbye today because I knew each one of them personally.

I was late for the graduation ceremony due to my SAT subject exams. As soon as the exams were over, I headed towards the gym where the soon-to-be graduates were seated, listening to Valedictorian's speech. Each one of them looked so smart, clothed in manly suits and sarees of beautiful colors. Looking at them altogether as one group, I realized that I was going to miss this bunch a lot. Priyankar, as a Valedictorian, said in his speech that life is all about beginning and end. I couldn't think of any way to deny that as a fact. Beginning and end.. The Class of 2012 is now done with high school and will soon experience the adventures of College life. Some of those graduates told me that they're going through a mix of feelings.. sadness, happiness, excitement... Seeing them throw the programme papers into the air with the roar of their class name, I thought, "yeah.. they're leaving... And I'm going to be in that place in a year."

Coming down the ramp was the hardest part as always. Saying goodbye to each one of them.. I walked slowly in the crowd and watched some of them cry, some of them hug their beloveds, and some of them smile, showing that they are ready to carry on with their lives.  Half way through, I was completely fine. But slowly, when I could see the end of the ramp, my eyes started watering. The end was drawing near. My last chance to say goodbyes to them would end when the ramp gets over, and they would leave this place to join bigger rivers and ocean. When I saw my music buddies, I could feel tears rolling down my cheeks. This class had so many talent musicians with whom I played instruments together and enjoyed music, discussing the fun in the pieces. I know that I will miss all of that a lot.

When I was busy crying, a random kid came upto me. He stared at me giving weird faces. "Are you even part of 12th grade?" He asked. Unable to stop crying, I shook my head sideways as to respond to his question. "Then, why are you crying?" he questioned in such a tone that I laughed. "I don't know" I replied with tears still rolling down my cheeks but with a smile on my face. I'm sure I would have looked like a retard laughing and crying at the same time. But thanks to that kid (though he didn't really intend to help me), I felt much better.

People will leave, but I'll encounter new people like this kid. I do not know his name, and I will probably not see him again because he must have one of the graduates' relatives. However, I won't be able to forget the comfort I got from that kid. He made me laugh, and my heart felt much lighter.

And.. I won't be able to forget the fun, laughter, happiness, and friendship I shared with each one of you, Class of 2012. Will miss you loads. No matter what, I will cherish the memories with you. And sometime in life, I'll be ready to meet you as a better person.

But for now.. Goodbye Sapere Aude.. :)

Different perspectives - our special ability

Central Argument: We like things more because of the psychological thoughts in us about what we are doing than because of the physical features.

Unlike other organisms, we humans have this ability to think. It’s fascinating how our thoughts can determine what we want, like, and so on. Sometimes, we tend to like things not because of the physical appearances or surface characteristics but because we simply like the logic or abstract such as pathos behind them. In the article, Why We Like What We Like, Alva Noë talks about how our minds and thoughts are the true factors that make us like any particular thing. And the more I experience, I feel this is true. We like things because we perceive things in certain ways.

One experience that really made me agree to this idea of liking things because of what we are doing was the one at orphanage. The kids seemed dirty whether they were well-dressed or not. They just looked different. On the surface, they might not seem to be those kids who I can hang around together naturally. However, once I started playing with them, I started liking them. They were such cute, little innocent kids I have ever met in my entire life. In the end, I even hugged them when saying goodbye. When I look at the pictures, I still find them very poor and dirty on the outer appearance, something that I’m not very fond of, but because the pictures remind me what I did with them, I smile and miss those times I spent with those lovely kids.

My first boyfriend was the one who made me realize even more that thoughts about what we are doing really determine what we like. Just the fact that I am with him, that I can talk to him… that I can smile, eat, and walk with him made me like the person him. Maintaining long-distance relationship, we couldn’t really spend time together at one place; but when I got a phone call from him, I was happy more than any other time of the day. On the surface, it’s just merely a phone call. However, because of the thought that I will be hearing my beloved’s voice and listen to his day stories, I get excited and I like to get phone calls.

Another example to prove the psychological impact of our likings is the story of my cousin sister. She hates capsicum. She will never eat anything if there’s a tiny little piece of capsicum put into her plate. One day, she refused to eat anything because she saw her mom put capsicum during the meal preparation. So, her mom cooked something else, promising that she wouldn’t put any capsicum into the food. Her mom, however, was smart enough to grind the capsicum to show as if no capsicum was added. So, my cousin sister had no idea about capsicum being mixed into the yummy-looking food in her plate. She took a spoon and said that that was the most amazing dish she has ever tasted. She likes the food because she thinks that there is no capsicum in the food. Her thoughts made her like capsicum unconsciously.

 

My experiences with orphanage kids and boyfriend, and my cousin sister’s experiences clearly support that thoughts actually do determine what we like. Whether consciously or unconsciously, we tend to like things because of the way we perceive and accept things. I believe this is such a gift that we can interpret things in the ways we believe in; it proves that we are special, different from all other living organism by having the ability to think and have different perspectives.

Please read my thoughts, thank you!

Central Argument: We should not forget the traditional ways of expressing appreciation by using words such as “please” and “thank you.”

These days, I feel people around me only receive without giving. What annoys me the most is people’s behavior as if they deserve to only receive from the very first place. It’s interesting how the write of the article Please Read This Story, Thank You has similar thoughts as mine. Words of appreciation such as “please” and “thank you” seem to disappear day by day. Through my experiences and observations, I realized that expressing appreciation is very important and should not be forgotten.

I myself have experienced several times the unpleasantness when people don’t appreciate. One day, I was asked by my classmate to help her with her homework. Honestly, she wasn’t a really close friend of mine, but I gladly agreed to help her. As I helped her with her work at that moment she asked me, I had to change my plans of my study timings. Though I knew I will have another sleepless night by helping her out, I chose to be a nice classmate and helped her get through the work as much as I needed. However, the moment I was a little uncertain with a part of the work, she started complaining that I am not smart enough to help her. She walked away without even saying two simple words, “thank you.”

My mom once told me about her unpleasant experience with people not knowing how to express appreciation. She helped one of her employees in her company to get through the difficult stage in her family. It is pretty rare to see a boss help out employee with family problems, but my mom wanted to be magnanimous and kind to all her employees. The employee got through with the family problems as my mom had spoken to that employee’s family members and sorted out the financial problems they faced. My mom was really glad that she could help. However, the very next month, the employee asked my mom to give her more money. He came into my mom’s office and simply said, “Give me more money. I need it.” First of all, there was no respect in the tone he asked. And most importantly, though he is the person who is in need and is asking a favor, he did not say “please.” My mom was terrified with the way her employee behaved towards her; she told me that people always think what they get is what they deserve, and they are not grateful at all. She was disappointed with her employee; her trust towards him broke completely, leading to firing him.

Many students say that teachers favor certain students. And perhaps, it may be true. However, once I started noticing the characteristics of students favored by teachers, I couldn’t deny teachers’ understandable preposition towards them. Students favored by teachers are polite, and by that, polite means their frequent use of“please” and “thank you” to teachers. Whether they ask teachers for help, questions, or even extensions for their homework, they never forget to appreciate the teachers’ kindness to permit their favors.

And of course, teachers unconsciously fall for these expressions of appreciation from those students, and thus favor these students. Even teachers are humans; they can’t help having more positive opinion about certain students than about other students who don’t care enough to appreciate teachers. The use of words “thank you” and “please” are such magical words. I’ve observed that students favored by teachers aren’t necessarily the clever and hard-working ones; some students who don’t even study still are favored by teachers just because of their behavior.

The use of these magical words “thank you” and “please” seems to be disappearing day by day. I am sure that most of the people would have experienced the unpleasantness of not being appreciated when they help others. We learn, as children, the way to respond when we receive help from others. It’s not very difficult, but it has great values and power to make people feel good about being appreciated. By accepting help from others happily and giving help to others happily by appreciating each other is the ideal way to cooperate in this independent society. We should not forget to express this appreciation. So, let’s use these words more often, “please” and “thank you.”

Because there's something more than science..

Central Argument: Science does not prove everything in this world because it is what humans develop over generations.

Science in our world has become one of the most important subjects to be learnt to understand our fundamental lives. Schools make science mandatory till students are aware of the basic concepts, and people around the world believe if one has great knowledge science, he or she is very smart. However, even the greatest scientists cannot prove everything in our lives. Thorsten Botz-Bornstein clearly states that not everything can be proved with science because humans are the ones who created science. Humans have limits themselves. When we lack knowledge, we won’t be able to know the truth and existence.

One debate that’s been going on between religion and science is the discussion about development of humans from chimpanzees. Some people say that according to classifications of animals, humans have similar characteristics with that of chimpanzees. It has been proven that lots of chimpanzees’ behaviors are similar to ours. However, there is no evidence that our ancestors were actually chimpanzees because our science cannot determine how the creatures are actually formed or are in existence now. This clearly shows that science is very limited.

The story of Wright brothers also shows that our opinions and thoughts are very limited with limited science. No one during their time ever thought that humans could fly. Because of limited science, people thought flying was just impossible. But since the moment Wright brothers proved and showed their hard work of years, people think of airplanes merely as one of the transportation systems. I feel things that we assume are impossible right now will one day be simply ignored of its difficulties by our children and their children. However, science will continue to have its limits during next generation and the next as well.

This example may be applicable only to some people; it’s about my faith. I believe that God exists because I have felt him through my heart, I have heard him through my worship, and I have talked to him through my prayers. People may say that God does not exist. But I believe that he is with me and so does many other believers of different religions in this world. However, many scientists argue that God’s existence cannot be proved by any device or instrument or even theories. Hence, they assume that God does not exist. However, before science developed, no one knew if humans had brains. Students wouldn’t have been sure if their professors really had brains because they haven’t touched or felt or smelled or seen their professors’ brains. Scientifically there wouldn’t have been any proof that professor has more knowledge than the students. Yet, there is this abstract mind called faith that cannot be proved by science.

Many people believe that science is what we need to believe because it gives right definition, rational decisions, and so on. However, there are so many things in life that cannot be understood with only science. There is a limit. Perhaps the extent of limit will be furthered when science develops. Nevertheless, people should not forget that science is what humans created with their limited knowledge and should hope that their beliefs about science will be clearly distinguished by the future generations.

When someone has eyes on you~

Central Argument: Surveillance makes us choose right actions but usually without the right reason -- wanting to do the right thing.

Everyone knows that they have different choices in their life. The two choices after narrowing down are the right and the wrong. Most of the time, the wrong path seems to be more thrilling and exciting, inculcating into people a desire to be bad despite their conscience. They do, however, know that their acts are wrong and often want to cover their mistakes from other people. Over time, the discovery of surveillance has been uncovering people’s mistakes, thus leading to even justice through surveillance. This makes people choose to do right things. However, as Emrys Westacott says, surveillance cannot make people morally upright; through experiences and observations of people’s behavior, it is clear that people choose to do right things under surveillance just because they feel someone is watching them and their immoral behaviors.

My aunt is very particular about obedience. All of us, especially her son Ye Chan, know this very well. I always thought Ye Chan, who is only five years old, knows to obey elders. However, one day when my aunt had asked me to take care of him, I noticed that he does not obey my grandparents. He screamed and threw things around when he was angry, and he did not eat healthy food but junk. But the day my aunt returned, he was again a quiet, cute little kid. We could simply say that this isn’t a big deal because he is still a small kid, but the fact he is still small yet knows how to behave when in front of his mom proves that humans want to cover their mistakes since they are very little kids.

While observing students and myself, I realize that surveillance doesn’t really make us morally upright. When a teacher gives an assignment to be submitted to plagiarism-detecting website turnitin.com, all of us try not to let even a single phrase to be copied from any source. However, when we are assigned to simply hand the work to the teacher, we usually do not care much even if we copy few phrases; we simply give an excuse: “well, I can’t think of any way to rephrase this.” It is so clear that we students are often stressed and not happy to submit our work on turnitin.com, showing that we aren’t really learning to be morally upright in our lives but are learning how to act accordingly under surveillance.

My uncle is another example. Although he is a working, employed adult, he does what we do in school – acting accordingly under surveillance. The day he sent me a chat, I wondered how he was free to chat with me during his working hours. It was soon clear that he usually chats with lots of people while his boss is not around. Perhaps he was really glad to chat with me after a long time, but if chatting during working hours is not wrong at all, why doesn’t he reply to my chats when his boss is around? My uncle stops chatting when his boss is around because he knows that chatting during working hours makes him a lazy, not-focused employee. Focusing on his work not because he wants to do the right thing but because he wants represent himself as a trustworthy employee, is that the goal of surveillance?

Surveillance surely makes people more likely to choose to do the right thing. But it does not make people to do so because of the right reasons. Observing a small kid Ye Chan, my friends who are teenagers, and adults like my uncle, I understood that whichever phase of life we are at, we only try to cover up our mistakes and thus do our best only under surveillance while we are carefree when we aren’t under surveillance. If we keep on acting right because we have to and not because we want to, will we be morally upright inside out or only when under surveillance forever?

Of Marriage and Single Life

Central Argument: Both being single or married has advantages as well as disadvantages; when man is single, he has the freedom yet does not have the caring mind a married man would have.

 In his essay, Of Marriage and Single Life, Francis Bacon writes about the advantages as well as the disadvantages of being either single or married men. He believes that Marriage life and single life both have positive and negative outcomes. I have a similar perspective or view point with that of Bacon. Looking at people around me, I can see the married and single men’s good or bad stands in their life.

One of the examples that shows single men are free is my uncle J. He is around 34 years old, the age people slowly think of him as an old bachelor. But I find uncle J very satisfied with his life. He graduated Columbia University of New York, he is popular, he is smart, and he enjoys working as a teacher admired by girls at a Korean Institution of English. He says that he does not have to return home at specific timings and need not worry anyone when he comes home late due to delayed work. He manages his finance on his own; he said it’s very comfortable. But one day, on our way to a camping trip, he shouted at my cousin for being very immature, and this incident made me agree with Francis Bacon’s statement that single men “are more cruel and hardhearted.”

I remember that day my mom told me that her brother-in-law, S, was quite upset when uncle J shouted at his son, my cousin. Maybe uncle J was right to try to educate the kid to be more mature, yet he couldn’t understand that little child’s immaturity by nature. All children pass a stage of immaturity; uncle J seemed to have no idea about it and simply scolded the child in front of the child’s parents. Uncle J, on the other hand, showed great understanding about kids the other day in a wedding. A kid spilled food on uncle J’s shirt while running around the hallway, and uncle J’s white shirt was dyed with different food colors. However, uncle S didn’t scold the child; instead, he asked the child to be careful not to get hurt anywhere while running.

Uncle S’s friend, however, told me once when he visited our house that he feels left out when Uncle S keeps on backing out on going for more outings or spending time with his friends. And so, Francis Bacon’s statement is right once again. Knowing Uncle S, he must have “transmit[ted] [his] dearest pledges” – spending time with his friends.

 
Being single is good. Being married is also good. However, both have disadvantages, either losing freedom or lacking magnanimity. Hence, in whichever situation men may be, they should enjoy as much freedom or ability given to them.

Youth and age

3. Central Argument: Both age and youth include positive and negative characteristics.

In his essay, Of Youth and Age, Sir Francis Bacon discusses the positive and negative characteristics of both age and youth. And I absolutely agree with his idea; I find so many young men passionate yet inexperienced, old men organized yet indifferent, and men of different age with various range of experiences and ponderous opinions.

I remember when I was a sports captain in middle school I wanted to make people more interested and passionate about sports. Only imagining the day people will love sports and participate in school sports activities, I merely made a chart filled with facts about why sports is good for you. I brought up the idea that on sports day we should have dance performances and special songs to entertain the audience. As suggested by Sir Francis Bacon in his essay, I, as a young girl, was “fitter for new projects;” I didn’t want to stick to the same, old ways previous sports captains simply followed. But time passed by, and I ended up following what all the previous captains had done. People loved the idea, but planning was a horrifying job. I wasn’t aware how to change the system our school had followed for years, how to organize the setting, and how to make people enthusiastic. I was not ready.

My mom, on the other hand, is a very well organized person through experiences. She is a teacher with more than twenty years of experience. But she told me something very interesting; she follows the same pattern of teaching even though the world is improving day by day. She says that she can’t even think of new ideas of making students excited about learning and that she is not really willing to make anymore changes in her teaching style. Teaching piano has now become a part of her life, but my mom tells me that she does not enjoy teaching anymore as much as she did when she first started it and sometimes wonder why she picked piano teacher as her profession. As mentioned in the essay by Sir Bacon, “men of age… adventure too little, repent too soon.”

Regardless age and youth, people have had different experiences through their lives, and we cannot ignore those valuable experiences just because we didn’t experience. Those experiences may have impacted people in positive or negative way. Noticing some people older than me very stereotypical when they face certain situations and some people younger than me very mature, I realized that both old and young people have good as well as bad characteristics to their behavior. What I must learn, though, is that others will also have opinions about me, either good or bad, and hence, I need to work on improving myself into a better experienced, mature, creative and passionate person in the society.